Monday 3 January 2011

Don't Let Me Fall

I remember when I got B.o.B's album, the Adventures of Bobby Ray. I wanted to skip past the track with T.I. cos I'd heard it and didn't like it. That was how I skipped the first track of the album and fell in love with several tracks further down. Good album, better (in my opinion, and this is my blog so that's all that counts) than Drake (sorry Laide), Minaj, and erm... who else released an album last year? Joke.
I started this post in the morning when I was happy. Now it's close to midnight and I'm terribly moody, and I can't for the life of me say why. But I think my sadness is a perfect setting for the emotional roller-coaster I'm about to describe.
I've always been unlucky in love. No, that's not right. I've had a few amazing relationships, and remain friends with all my exes to this day. But I still feel I have no idea how to handle a relationship, to... erm... 'be a man', as they say. So after my first (and only) relationship in Babcock University I decided I wouldn't enter a relationship again if it wasn't completely on my terms. The trouble is it takes me a while to decide whether or not I want to date a chick, even if I fall in love 'at first sight' (barf). So I usually end up unsure whether I want a relationship with a girl I've already shown a lot of attention, so much she probably already thinks I'm a realistic prospect.  I'm talking too much. What I'm trying to get at is I fell in love and started up a weird relationship, knowing it couldn't last. Foolish, typical me. I should have 'been a man' and told her we couldn't be, but I was way too far gone to think about such petty thing as reality and my terrible track record as far as communication is concerned, and the fact we'd only known each other for 3 weeks. To cut a long story short, I've called her twice in... let me see... thirty-two days since I got back from Nigeria. I know, I know, I suck as a boyfriend. I guess I can't be all great. As at now, we're in that magical land called Limbo. Will I 'do the right thing' and break it off? Not a chance. I'm still in love.
The weird thing is, while I was deciding to date my camp chick, I felt I was cheating on someone I have never met. And that brings me to another one of my numerous problems. I get attached to people far too easily. If you've been following me on Twitter for a while you'll know, or at least have an idea, who I'm going on about. Unless of course I'm a far bigger flirt than I like to think I am. 
I know I am not, and have never been in a relationship with her, but I've grown accustomed to chatting intimately with her and therein lie the seeds of my imminent destruction. In a few years my folks will ask me to get married. I'll be faced with a major dilemma as I have a new crush on average twice a week. The problem is the old crushes don't die as new ones come in. Oh they may fade, but as soon as I remember I'm wondering what I can do to keep them alive. I think that Slum Village song Selfish is my mindset paraphrased.
And now comes the most annoying part of my life right now. There are several females in Nigeria who claim an interest in me, but of course I didn't have an idea of this while I was there... And now I'm supposed to love them from afar. Fuck that! In fact, maybe I should quit social networking. ("Yeah right!" I hear you say.) 
Okay I'm gonna stop this monologue abruptly right here with a prayer. I'm sure you're really bored already, maybe even confused by the way my genius mind works.
GOD PLEASE DON'T LET ME FALL IN LOVE WITH ANYONE NEW! ABEG! AMEN.

3 comments:

  1. Buahahahaha,serzly,Olumide,dunno why this sounded funny,before I continue I should let you know that you're a bigger flirt than you think you are.
    You know,the truth is you don't want to make it work,the moment you decide that,I bet you'll post a differnt story,you can crush as many girlies as you can but a crush isn't the thing,since I'm likely going to be the only person to comment,I'm going to need lotta space,this life is full of shit,untrustworthy folks and oldies,cheats,heats and eats,3 different madness,but I've come to realise that it's what you make outta these madness that stays,kill the cheats,change the heats and starve the eats and you are on the go,k,I'm rambling but I've got space,you probably know all these but you are Olumide (surname) Different,you must be sexing one chick out there''wink'',or a miserable virgin like me or a repentant born again or a weirdo like me,whichever comes first,Olu,make it work.
    About that intimate stuff I saw,If I catch you ehnnnn?natty guy.Crush in but crush out too.
    I love you.

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  2. Buahahaha,Olumide,serzly dunno why this sounded funny,niwayz since it's likely I might be the only person to comment,I might as well take all the space,see ehn,you just don't want any of your relationships to work,the day you decide to make it work,you definitely post a different story,crush as many as possible but when the real thing comes,you'll know,this life is full of shit,untrustworthy people,haters and bla bla bla,the cheats the heat and the eats,3 classes of madness but it's what you make outta this that matters,kill the cheats,change the heats and starve the eats,k,I'm rambling but I've got space,when your people come on your neck,tell them you are still crushing,crush in and crush out too,you can make it work but you have to work,plenty things oh.Its either you're sexing some chic out there,''wink'',or you're a miserable virgin like me,or you're a repentant one or a weirdo like me,whatever when its time,you'll act.
    Btw that line about intimate talk if I catch you ehnn,your ears straight and sure lips.
    I love you

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  3. I'm not such a huge flirt jo! I love you too though, you're such a sweetheart...

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